Three Play Featuring The Chicago Sports Scene

It's a day like this that the dirty sports reporter inside of me dies for. And if you are lucky enough to be a sports editor for one of the Windy City's newspapers, you've had yourself a newsday.

You'd also be lucky if you got the opportunity to go home with one of these girls.

Just sayin'.

BENSON BURNOUT

Cedric Benson's time in Chicago is up.

The lethal combination of poor performance on the field and poor decision making off it have cost Benson his job. The No. 4 overall pick in 2005 was released by the Bears Monday afternoon when coach Lovie Smith told Benson to go home when he showed up for practice.

Benson's career to this point has been star-crossed, to say the least. He never appealed to the fans, and how could you when you have a lengthy hold out before you've even taken a snap in the NFL. Then once in The League, Benson was out played by journeyman Thomas Jones mostly because Jones was willing to be a good teammate who had a history of being a gym rat. And when he did get playing time, Cedric was less than entertaining (did you see what I did there?) and would have likely ran second string behind second round draft pick Matt Forte.

Move over Cade McNown, Curtis Enis and Rashaan Salaam because No. 32 will likely go down as the No. 1 bust in the franchise's history.

MY COUSIN COACH VINNY

The Chicago Bulls have officially wasted all of the momentum and buzz generated by winning the No. 1 pick by taking the cheap way out.

Sources say the Bulls are close to naming Mike D'Antoni Doug Collins Vinny Del Negro as the team's next head coach. The former San Antonio Spurs guard (whose name loosely translates to "Vinny of the Negroes) has absolutely no coaching experience, but is currently the assistant general manager of the Phoenix Suns and has interviewed for the vacancies in Chicago and Phoenix.

A move like this just shows how cheap Jerry Reinsdorf is. The Bulls had a chance to bring in an offensive mind such as D'Antoni, a former Coach of the Year in Avery Johnson, a teacher such as Collins. But settled for Del Negro, despite the best candidate just might have been Boston Celtics defensive assistant Tom Thibodeau. (Yeah, I'm agreeing with Jay Mariotti. Deal with it.)

Del Negro's coaching career will be decided by whoever the Bulls choose as their No. 1 pick. Will the former point guard lean towards Derrick Rose or the front court beast Michael Beasley.

THE SECOND CITY'S FIRST PLACE BASEBALL TEAMS

Chicago's baseball teams aren't taking a back seat to anyone, whether it be in their own towns or in their respective divisions.

The Chicago Cubs sport the best record in Major League Baseball and are preparing to host the Atlanta Braves, who might be playing without All-Star Chipper Jones. Five days after being chewed out during his start against the San Diego Padres, Jason Marquis puts forth his best effort of the season.

Coincidence? I think not!

The Chicago White Sox ain't to shabby either. The South Sider's completed a perfect homestand with a 7-5 win over the second-place Minnesota Twins and are currently enjoying a 7-game winning streak while averaging more than 9 runs per game in that span. And to think, Ozzie Guillen was tired of watching this team.

Who the hell gets tired of watching a first-place ball club? Well, it's understandable if you have to do it from U.S. Cellular Field.

This is a hell of a way to end a short week of blogging. I'm going on vacation and will be away from my computer 'til at least Monday. But don't worry, I have stuff in the can that will be unleashed beginning next Tuesday. Hopefully.

Unfortunately, I won't be able to put out my unique spin on the Bulls coaching search which would have netted the team (presumably) its first player-coach, Michael Beasley.

Topics that might be touched on are as follows:

• Where has Mark Prior gone?
• Chicago's Olympic Hopes
• Sleeping with the enemy (like when you're most hated rival joins your favorite team)
• The statistical anomaly that was the 2005 Chicago White Sox
• And hopefully a preview of the Crosstown Classic

That's it. I'm gone to pack. Take care!

Three-Play Starring Hamilton, Hookers and the Holiness of Fenway Park

Welcome to the newest segment of "Three-Play" where I provide a picture of three hot chicks and take on three hot topics that probably deserve an entire blog of their own, but won't get it because of time constraints.

Alright, let's get into it!

First, where's someone who is proficient in photoshop when I need them? I ask the question because everyone who loves the Chicago Cubs as much as I do should be asking themselves how good would Josh Hamilton look patrolling center field in Cubbie blue pinstripes?

Hamilton, a former No. 1 overall pick by the Tampa Bay Devil Rays in 1999, was acquired by the Cubs in the 2007 Rule V Draft, but was sent to the Cincinnati Reds for $50,000. In his rookie year, Hamilton hit 19 home runs, drove in 47 runs and his slash stats (batting average, on-base percentage and slugging percentage) were .292/.368/.554.

In the off-season, the Cincinnati Reds flipped Hamilton to the Texas Rangers in exchange for starting pitcher Edinson Volquez. Volquez is leading the world with a 1.31 ERA pitching under the tutelage of Dusty Baker.

Don't worry Reds fans, Dusty's learned from the mistakes he made with Mark Prior and Kerry Wood. Oh wait, he hasn't.

So let's look at the big picture, shall we?

Josh Hamilton, who is batting .329 with 13 HR and 58 RBI, could (and should) be batting 5th in the already potent Cubs line-up, which would enable manager Lou Piniella to move right fielder Kosuke Fukudome's .406 OBP to the No. 2 slot.

Oh, so you're happy with the three blind mice playing center field now for the Cubs, who have combined to hit a paltry .203.

Well, then maybe you could find use out of Volquez who is 7-2 with 76 strikeouts in 62 innings pitched. He'd be the legit No. 2 starter missing from the Cubs starting rotation.

Ladies and gentlemen, exhibit A on why Jim Hendry should not be retained as general manager after his contract expires.

The man who should make that decision is prospective buyer Mark Cuban.

Cuban, who owns the NBA's Dallas Mavericks, has been quite vocal about wanting to buy the North Siders and has the support of most of Cubdom (which should go a long way, but won't.) Recently, Cuban made an appearance on Dan Patrick's radio show where he called the Cubs his hooker.

While it shocked some, I'm not one of them. I've always compared being a Cubs fan to being in a relationship with a woman. She looks good (see Wrigley Field.) She teases (see 1969, 1984, 1989 and 2003.) But damn, she's expensive (see ticket and beer prices.) But in the end, she's the greatest thing in the world (ask my opinion.)

If Mark Cuban has a little Pac Man Jones in him, he'd make it rain on Sam Zell with an offer he can't refuse.

While I wax nostalgic about Wrigley, Boston Red Sox fans do the same when it comes to Fenway Park. To the point where fans had their baby baptized at the yard.

Um, dude. That wasn't Holy water.

Three-Play starring the Rocket, Riley and Retarded GM's Part One

"Three-Play" ... now that's what I'm talking about!

"Three-Play" is the newest segment to "Bloggers" and will be un-officially sponsored by siuDE.com, because who knew that more people trust news written by a bunch of college kids over "professionals."


(Ha! Not with leads written like that!)

As for "Three-Play," let's introduce our players for this evening.

First, former Miami Heat head coach Pat Riley.

I was sitting at the sports desk, chillin', when I learned that Riley was reportedly leaving the team to go back to his comfy front-office position.

While this story will get swept under the rug by most journalist, I won't take it. Pat Riley is a quitter, and what he's doing now is no better than what Bobby Petrino did to Louisville ... or the Atlanta Falcons, for that matter.

He deserves to be absolutely reamed, but he won't because he's Pat Friggin' Riley. I'm sick of his greasy hair, pompous attitude, dirty players and his quittin' ass ways! He's only doing this to hire a Stan Van Gundy-redux, just so he can fire him when the team is about to take off and win another championship.

Shame on him, for thinking he would get this past any responsible sports journalist. But it's OK, that's why I'm here to stop the madness!

...

Enter stage left Roger Clemens, who allegedly had a 10-year fling with country star Mindy McCready.

A player with an extra-marital affair - no way!

What's newsworthy about this story is that the affair began when McCready was a 15-year-old aspiring country singer.

What's kinda sad is that no one ran with this story until the Associated Press ran with it. Again, shame.

Because it's not like there's another public figure who likes 'em fresh off the playground.

...

And finally, an editorial.

My team's favorite General Managers have failed me (part one.)

That's right, failed.

Let's start with Jerry Angelo, who put together a productive draft, but really failed to add any difference makers (other than former Southern Illinois quarterback Nick Hill).

I know they needed offensive line help, but that could have been addressed in the second round. And instead of getting into every draft pick, I'll give you what I would have done in rounds 1 thru 5 (because the 7th round is a crap-shoot.)

ROUND 1: Chris Williams, OL, Vanderbilt Rashard Mendenhall, RB, Illinois

ROUND 2: Matt Forte, RB, Tulane DeSean Jackson, WR, California

ROUND 3: Earl Bennett, WR, Vanderbilt Jeremy Zuttah, OG, Rutgers

ROUND 3: Marcus Harrison, DT, Arkansas Chad Rinehart, OG, Northern Iowa

ROUND 4: Craig Steltz, S, LSU Red Bryant, DT, Texas A&M (run stuffer)

ROUND 5: Zack Bowman, CB, Nebraska Kellen Davis, TE, Michigan State

ROUND 5: Kellen Davis, TE, Michigan State Trae Williams, CB, South Florida

As you can see, I disagreed with almost every pick.

Mendenhall would have provided the Bears with the home run hitting running back this town has been desperate for since Neal Anderson (yes, I went there.)

DeSean Jackson would walk into Halas Hall and be the best receiver on the Bears, without a doubt.

Zuttah and Rinehart are versatile linemen that will be productive in the NFL. Bryant is described as a run-stuffer and if you saw what Adrian Peterson did to the Bears, you'd thank me for that pick.

And finally, in drafting Trae Williams, you would have been drafting Mike Jenkins light. So you're not talking much of a drop off.

To add salt to the wound, the Bears passed on my favorite players that would have totally helped the team.

Mike Hart, RB, Michigan would have been nice -- and will likely have a better career than Matt Forte, Joseph Forte or even ESPN personality, Pat Forde.

Mario Manningham, WR, Michigan would walk into Halas Hall and be the best receiver on the Bears without even haven taken one NFL snap. But you can say that about almost every wideout in the year's draft.

Nick Hill, QB, Southern Illinois was thankfully signed to a three-year deal after the draft concluded. Go! Nick! Go!