A Different Kind Of Monday

It was a different kind of Monday for Chicago and its baseball teams.

A week after the Cubs swept the White Sox at Wrigley Field, the ChiSox returned the favor at U.S. Cellular Field.

I won't let the angry Cubs fan inside me or the inquisitive baseball mind analyze this series. Instead I'll let my alter ego, "Stat Boy," break it down.

Take it away...

The Chicago White Sox dominated all facets of this series. And that's putting it nicely.

The Boys from Bridgeport upped their home record to 28-11 while dropping the Wrigleyville Nine's road record to a dismal 19-23.

The Southsiders out-homered the Northsiders 7-3 in the series. The Cubs three homers came off the bats of Geovany Soto, Mike Fontenot and Jim Edmonds in the Game One loss. Unfortunately for the Cubs, no one was on base for the bombs.

In the Sox' Game Three victory, two run homers by Bryan Anderson and Jim Thome, along with Carlos Quentin's solo shot accounted for all of the runs scored by the Men In Black to secure the sweep.

The White Sox bullpen did not allow one measly run in 8.5 innings pitched. The Cub bullpen surrendered 5 runs (and two homers) in 8.2 innings. In fact, the entire Cubs pitching staff was out-pitched. The Sox whiffed 25 batters, while the Cubs pitchers only 'K-ed' 21.

And that's the tale of the tape here from Chicago, as I am out of nicknames for each team.

Crosstown Classic Preview Part Deux

It's put up or shut up time for the Chicago White Sox.

Last week while their players, general manager, and field manager were shooting verbal insults at the Cubs' fans, their beloved stadium and the fact that they hadn't won the whole damn thing in 100 years.

And all the Cubs did was let their bats do all the talking as they swept away their cross-town rivals.

Now the series shifts to U.S. Cellular Field where the White Sox are 24-11. Conversely, the Cubs are a less than impressive 16-20 on the road.

However, the Cubs should be the LEAST of the Sox' concerns as the Minnesota Twins are 0.5 games out of first place.

That means a Sox loss and a win by the Twinkies takes away a little bit of the shine behind a series that pits a pair of first place teams against one another.

Nevertheless, this should be a fun series to watch. I will especially keep an eye on ESPN's Sunday Night Telecast.

Will Joe Morgan apologize to Cubs fans after creating a crock of crap and belittling the name of the great Ernie Banks?

Will Jon Miller, who is a much better announcer in MLB 2K8 than in real life, not sound like a monotonous piece of crap?

Will Morgan give himself another hard-on while analyzing Carlos Quentin's perfect right-handed swing?

Only time will tell. Until then, let's play ball!

P.S. GO CUBS GO!

Crosstown Classic A Sweeping Success For North Siders

On the field, the Cubs are the best in the bigs, so it should be no surprise that they are the best in the city.

Off the field, it was the Chicago White Sox acting like the ignored step-child, doing all the talking.

Manager Ozzie Guillen ranted about rats as big as pigs lifting weights in the right field batting cages. General Manger Kenny Williams wished the Cubs a "Happy Anniversary" and catcher A.J. Pierzynski called Cubs fans "idiots." Oh, and John Danks called Wrigley Field a [bleep] hole.

In the end, the Cubs let their bats do the talking as they belted nine home runs in the weekend sweep of the Sox.

Aramis Ramirez singlehandedly put the White Sox on their back with four home runs, including a pair of home runs (one of which was a walk-off winner off Scott Linebrink) in Friday's 4-3 come-from-behind win.

Former nemesis Jim Edmonds (who will be getting a blog entry in the coming days dedicated to him) hit two home runs in the nine run fourth inning of the Cubs 11-7 win on Saturday. And even though Ozzie didn't want to give Edmonds credit for the work he did against the Sox, you can't ignore Edmonds and his .311/.358/.511 slash stats he has posted since joining the Cubs.

In the sweep-clinching 7-1 victory, Ryan Dempster moved to 9-0 at Wrigley Field (and 9-2 overall) by limiting the Sox to one run on 10 hits in eight innings of work. On the other side, the strike-zone-challenged Javier Vazquez walked the first two batters on eight pitches and gave up homers to Ramirez and Eric "Don't Call Me Corey" Patterson, who already has a more successful Cub career than his brother.

The weekend series puts the Cubs at 48-28 overall (still the best record in the bigs) and 32-8 at the Friendly Confines. The loss drops the Sox to 41-31 who saw their lead in the AL Central shrink to 1.5 games over the suddenly streaking Minnesota Twins.

I can't WAIT 'til next weekend!

Crosstown Classic: Round 1 Preview

For the first time since the inception of Interleague Play, the Chicago Cubs and White Sox are atop their respective divisions. And that's only one reason the city should be on heightened alert.

Yet, when I think of Cubs-Sox, this picture comes to mind.

The Cubs (45-28) enter the series with the best record in baseball.

Let it sink in. Best. Record. In. Baseball.

The Sox (41-31) enjoy the largest lead of any division leader and come into the series white hot (pun intended) after sweeping the Pittsburgh Pirates at U.S. Cellular Field.

To the three Sox fans that read this blog, let it sink in. Largest. Lead. Of. Any. Division. Leader.

Fans of both sides should expect some excellent baseball to be played despite the fact the first round of games will be without the star presence of Alfonso Soriano, Carlos Zambrano, Paul Konerko and Mark Buehrle.

The Cubs will look to take advantage of some home cooking in the three game set. At 29-8, the Friendly Confines is finally living up to its name for the team with white jerseys with blue pinstripes, blue numbers, blue shoes and blue caps. Conversely, the Sox are 17-20 on the road. But really, who isn't below .500 on the road this year?

Game One will feature dueling lefties to start the game. John Danks (4-4) takes the hill for the South Siders and he will be opposed by Ted Lilly (7-5.)

Rebounding right-handers will toe the rubber in Game Two. Jose Contreras (6-5, 3.24) is enjoying a bounce back year, while Jason Marquis (5-3, 4.24) is 2-0 since being railed by manager Lou Piniella after being pulled in a poor outing against the San Diego Padres.

Finally, ESPN gives the Yanks and the Sawks a rest and instead will feature the Battle for Red Line Supremacy's third game. Javier Vazquez (7-5, 4.13) will oppose Ryan Dempster (8-2, 2.76) who is almost unhittable at Wrigley Field (1.11 WHIP in 58.1 IP.)

In closing, I'll leave you some of the match-ups and in the comments section you can tell me who you'd take.

Let's get interactive people!

CATCHER: Geovany Soto (.286 12 HR 48 RBI) vs. A.J. Pierzynski (.306 4 HR 26 RBI)

FIRST BASE: Derrek Lee (.283 14 HR 44 RBI) vs. Nick Swisher (.230 8 HR 27 RBI

SECOND BASE: Mark DeRosa (.296 8 HR 30 RBI) vs. Alexei Ramirez (.289 4 HR 20 RBI)

SHORTSTOP: Ryan Theriot (.309 1 HR 21 RBI) vs. Orlando Cabrera (.273 5 HR 26 RBI)

THIRD BASE: Aramis Ramirez (.295 10 HR 45 RBI) vs. Joe Crede (.284 15 HR 44 RBI)

OUTFIELD 1: Matt Murton/Micah Hoffpauir (.299 0 HR 5 RBI in 50 ABs)vs. Carlos Quentin (.270 17 HR 56 RBI)

OUTFIELD 2: Jim Edmonds/Reed Johnson (.285 5 HR 50 RBI as Cubs) vs. Brian Anderson (.247 3 HR 11 RBI in 97 ABs)

OUTFIELD 3: Kosuke Fukudome (.295 5 HR 30 RBI) vs. Jermaine Dye (.286 12 HR 32 RBI)

BULLPEN: Carlos Marmol (63 K in 43 IP) and Kerry Wood (18 SV 2.65 ERA) vs. Scott Linebrink (16 HLD 1.29 ERA) and Bobby Jenks (16 SV 1.91 ERA)

P.S. Go Cubs Go!

And to add fuel to the fire, check out this youtube video!

Three Play Featuring The Chicago Sports Scene

It's a day like this that the dirty sports reporter inside of me dies for. And if you are lucky enough to be a sports editor for one of the Windy City's newspapers, you've had yourself a newsday.

You'd also be lucky if you got the opportunity to go home with one of these girls.

Just sayin'.

BENSON BURNOUT

Cedric Benson's time in Chicago is up.

The lethal combination of poor performance on the field and poor decision making off it have cost Benson his job. The No. 4 overall pick in 2005 was released by the Bears Monday afternoon when coach Lovie Smith told Benson to go home when he showed up for practice.

Benson's career to this point has been star-crossed, to say the least. He never appealed to the fans, and how could you when you have a lengthy hold out before you've even taken a snap in the NFL. Then once in The League, Benson was out played by journeyman Thomas Jones mostly because Jones was willing to be a good teammate who had a history of being a gym rat. And when he did get playing time, Cedric was less than entertaining (did you see what I did there?) and would have likely ran second string behind second round draft pick Matt Forte.

Move over Cade McNown, Curtis Enis and Rashaan Salaam because No. 32 will likely go down as the No. 1 bust in the franchise's history.

MY COUSIN COACH VINNY

The Chicago Bulls have officially wasted all of the momentum and buzz generated by winning the No. 1 pick by taking the cheap way out.

Sources say the Bulls are close to naming Mike D'Antoni Doug Collins Vinny Del Negro as the team's next head coach. The former San Antonio Spurs guard (whose name loosely translates to "Vinny of the Negroes) has absolutely no coaching experience, but is currently the assistant general manager of the Phoenix Suns and has interviewed for the vacancies in Chicago and Phoenix.

A move like this just shows how cheap Jerry Reinsdorf is. The Bulls had a chance to bring in an offensive mind such as D'Antoni, a former Coach of the Year in Avery Johnson, a teacher such as Collins. But settled for Del Negro, despite the best candidate just might have been Boston Celtics defensive assistant Tom Thibodeau. (Yeah, I'm agreeing with Jay Mariotti. Deal with it.)

Del Negro's coaching career will be decided by whoever the Bulls choose as their No. 1 pick. Will the former point guard lean towards Derrick Rose or the front court beast Michael Beasley.

THE SECOND CITY'S FIRST PLACE BASEBALL TEAMS

Chicago's baseball teams aren't taking a back seat to anyone, whether it be in their own towns or in their respective divisions.

The Chicago Cubs sport the best record in Major League Baseball and are preparing to host the Atlanta Braves, who might be playing without All-Star Chipper Jones. Five days after being chewed out during his start against the San Diego Padres, Jason Marquis puts forth his best effort of the season.

Coincidence? I think not!

The Chicago White Sox ain't to shabby either. The South Sider's completed a perfect homestand with a 7-5 win over the second-place Minnesota Twins and are currently enjoying a 7-game winning streak while averaging more than 9 runs per game in that span. And to think, Ozzie Guillen was tired of watching this team.

Who the hell gets tired of watching a first-place ball club? Well, it's understandable if you have to do it from U.S. Cellular Field.

This is a hell of a way to end a short week of blogging. I'm going on vacation and will be away from my computer 'til at least Monday. But don't worry, I have stuff in the can that will be unleashed beginning next Tuesday. Hopefully.

Unfortunately, I won't be able to put out my unique spin on the Bulls coaching search which would have netted the team (presumably) its first player-coach, Michael Beasley.

Topics that might be touched on are as follows:

• Where has Mark Prior gone?
• Chicago's Olympic Hopes
• Sleeping with the enemy (like when you're most hated rival joins your favorite team)
• The statistical anomaly that was the 2005 Chicago White Sox
• And hopefully a preview of the Crosstown Classic

That's it. I'm gone to pack. Take care!

ChiSox Fans' Favorite Team Is Whoever Beats The Cubs

On May 29, I ripped Cubs fans sitting down the left field line for their inappropriate behavior in a game the Cubs would eventually win.

And by "inappropriate behavior" I mean these idiots put their hands in the field of play as left fielder Alfonso Soriano ran towards foul territory to catch a fly ball.

You know, kinda like this guy. But Fonzie caught the ball, gave some menacing stares to the douches in the front row and the inning was over.

Fast forward to June 4, where after watching the Padres snap the Cubs' 9-game winning streak I wanted to see a potential Lou Piniella meltdown in his post-game press conference. However, I was treated to some free baseball, courtesy of the White Sox and the Kansas City Royals.

Let's set the scene, shall we?

It's the bottom of the 15th inning in a 4-4 tie and the South Siders' best hitter (Carlos Quentin) is at the plate. And (what's left of the) crowd is going wild. Ready for a pop quiz? What were the Sox fans chanting?

A) "LET'S GO WHITE SOX!!!!"
B) "CAR-LOS! CAR-LOS!"
C) "CUBS LOST! CUBS LOST!"

If you selected answer choice A or B, you're retarded and do not have your finger on the pulse of Chicago baseball. In fact, it's probably up your ass.

But if you chose answer C, then you're the winner! You're prize? You get to read the rest of this fabulous rant.

Ready? I am.

AND THIS IS WHY NO ONE RESPECTS THE FANS OF THE SOUTH SIDE PROFESSIONAL BASEBALL TEAM!!!!

Despite your team's 2005 World Championship, your primary focus in life still seems to be on what happens with the North Sider's. You're the idiots that care more if the Cubs lose than if the Sox win.

That's dumb, immature and to be honest I grew out of that stage of my life a long time ago. And maybe you should too. Why? Because the Sox are in first place in the AL Central, a division they were projected to be battling for the bottom with the Kansas City Royals.

Instead, you're in first. And your primary concern is that the Cubs lost for the first time in their last 10 games. What a bunch of losers.

And since I'll likely get ripped by Sox fans who read this, I might as well pile on.

Your manager is a loudmouth who rips his boss, players and coaches under the bus, despite the team being in first place. He attacks columnists, former players and Cubs fans because he suffers from "Little Brother Syndrome."

Your broadcasters are the second worst in baseball, because no broadcasting duo sucks more than Joe Buck and Tim McCarver.

While Hawk is busy reminiscing over his days in Boston, accusing every umpire of having an agenda against the White Sox and providing little-to-no play-by-play when things aren't going the Sox's way, DJ brings absolutely no analysis to the table.

Your owner is a cheap, pompous jackass who apparently doesn't believe in awarding those who helped you become who you are today. Jerry Reinsdorf would be an absolute L-7 Weenee if not for Michael Jordan, and don't you forget that!

The Sox have two things going for them. Radio analyst Steve Stone (who spent a long time educating Cubs fans everywhere) and the food. I can get my Stoney fix on WSCR 670 when he's on with Mike Mulligan and Brian Hanley. As for food, I'm not sure if you know that I am an awesome cook.

So take that and shove it Sox fans. See ya June 20 when the team with the best record in baseball is strokin' you at beautiful Wrigley Field!

Defending Ozzie Guillen

It's no secret. I do not like Ozzie Guillen.

I do not like the way he manages the game whether it's his bullpen or the way he throws on his "Sunday line-up" giving players a day off while handing the opposition a win. Off the field, he's loud and obnoxious as he throws out homosexual slurs at local columnists, slams his former players and feeds the fire that as White Sox fans suffer from something called "Little Brother Syndrome" while standing in the shadow of the Cubs despite the statistical anomaly they know as the 2005 World Series Championship.

With all that said, I am about to defend Ozzie Guillen.

After the ChiSox's 4-3 extra inning loss to the Tampa Bay Rays, Mt. Guillen erupted (again.)

"There's only one message I'm going to send ... Just be ready because I expect movement Tuesday. I expect Kenny [Williams] to do something Tuesday, and if we don't do anything Tuesday, there are going to be a lot of lineup changes. That's all I'm going to say about the offense.''

"It can be me. It can be [hitting coach] Greg Walker. It can be the players. It could be anybody. I'm sick and tired to watch this thing for a year and a half. I'm not protecting anybody anymore. [Bleep] it! If they can't get it done, Kenny should find someone to get it done. That's it. Another bad game. If we think we are going to win with the offense we have, we are full of [bleep]. I'm just being honest. I expect better from them, if they are in the lineup.''

The Chicago sports media is having a field day with Ozzie's latest rant, especially with the idea that Guillen is throwing his general manager under the bus.

Call me Out of Step Charlie, but let's take a closer look at Ozzie's statement.

"I expect Kenny [Williams] to do something Tuesday, and if we don't do anything Tuesday, there are going to be a lot of lineup changes."

I don't see where he's throwing Kenny under the bus. To me, that statement says that Williams is working on something, and if that something doesn't come Tuesday that Ozzie will change the lineup.

Ozzie has the right to be pissed off.

That makes sense a lot of sense to me because if something is not working you have to change it, right? And that's what Ozzie says he's going to do.

Oh, what about the second part of the statement?

"It can be me. It can be [hitting coach] Greg Walker. It can be the players. It could be anybody."

It's not like Ozzie's putting the blame on everyone but himself, he's putting it on everyone. Walker's gotta get in there and adjust something with the new guys like Orlando Cabrera and Nick Swisher or the vets like Jim Thome or Paul Konerko. If he can't get it done, you've gotta find someone that can get it done. It's as simple as that.

And while everyone in this town will continue to pile on Ozzie, I'll take issue with Kenny Williams.

The Sox could have dumped Paulie on the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim in the off-season in a trade that was rumored to bring in speedster Chone Figgins and starting pitcher Ervin Santana but didn't.

As for the trades Williams did make this off-season, they haven't worked out too well. I'd call the Jon Garland for Orlando Cabrera trade a wash, seeing that Garland would not have been brought back and at this point Cabrera will suffer the same fate as well.

And while I reamed Cubs fans last week from not learning from past mistakes, Kenny Williams is about to feel the same wrath.

Hey Kenny, did you read 'Moneyball?' Oh wait, you didn't have to. You were the subject of Athletics GM Billy Beane's fleece fest and you fell for it again!

The White Sox acquired Swisher in exchange for pitching prospects Gio Gonzalez and Faustino De Los Santos and outfield prospect Ryan Sweeney.

Gonzalez ranked No. 72 in Baseball America's Top 100 prospect list in 2007 and Sweeney checked in at No. 55. De Los Santos, 21, went 10-5 with a 0.92 ERA between stops at 'A-ball' and could be the prized pig of the deal.

Swisher's numbers alarm me and make me believe he's a...dare I say...PEDophile. As in Performance Enhancing Drugs. In 2006, Swisher hit 35 home runs and drove in 95 runs. One year later, Swish saw his numbers drop to 22/78.

Oh did I mention he's across the bay from BALCO???? I'm not saying, I'm just saying.

It is Williams' job to provide Guillen with the best players available. It's Guillen's job to put those players in the best position to succeed.

If one isn't doing their job, the other fails. And despite all of that, the Sox are still in first place.

I hope Hollywood has got it's scripts ready.